04-18-2007, 04:28 AM
It was a normal working day for me that day. Two (2) tickets (Hialeah Specials- 316.646(1), & 320.0605), and Four (4) 62's. I was enroute to the station to close off my worksheet and transfer all of my stuff from my police vehicle to my p.o.v when I observed what appeared to be a 37 occupied. First thought was ahhh F*ck it! But it was just to tempting to let go. Ok Picture this & let me set the mood: An 89 Caddy Fleetwood White in color with dark tints blacked out. Parked in a City Park after hours. I immediately blacked out and began slowly creeping up on it from behind. My first thought was 40 over/under subjects smoking 52. Obviously Right? Wrong. As I got closer to the vehicle, I noticed the car rocking back & fourth and although the tints were dark, I could clearly see the windows were fogged and misty. It became immediately clear to me that I was facing a 33 in progress. I had to be very careful as I approached the 37 occupied because my vehicle makes a f*cked up noise when the brakes are applied and I didn't want to spook them. So I decided to park about twenty (20) feet away and leg it. As I was walking up to the 37 occupied I was imagining a Fine 33 with long brown hair, 5'5, 120 Lbs., huge jugs and a huge a$$ that would make a blind man cry for his mother. The minute I reached the vehicle I drew my weapon and quickly opened the vehicles rear door. A cloud of sex rushed out of the vehicle and into my F*cking face, mouth, eyes, etc... It felt like getting pepper sprayed all over again. Once I regained partial vision in my eyes, I shined my flashlight into the smokey sex filled vehicle and to my horror observed Two (2) Homosexual males with sex toys in their possesion. They looked like two deers caught in headlights. One of the homosexual males was laying on his back spread eagle with the other homosexual male filling his rectal cavity with 12 inches of pure black rubber dildo. They say your first reaction is always the right one. Well, my first reaction was to immediately close the door without saying a word, holster my weapon & flashlight and walk back to my vehicle with this blank look of disgust on my face. While driving to the station it hit me. I had just ingested a homosexual sex cloud when I opened the door. That night when I arrived home, I took a long shower, scrubbed the sh*t out of my face and drank a fifth of Black label with the hopes of erasing the disturbing image that was tragically burned into my head. So fellow officers beware of your next 37 occupied. For you to may encounter Richard Simmons and Sir Elton John doing not so pleasent things. WHAT'S THE MORAL OF THIS STORY? LIKE A MIDGET AT A URINAL... YOU HAVE TO BE ON YOUR TOES!! [/b]