Signal 76

[Unregistered]

You're a ****y ace trooper. You will need one of us one day.

[Unregistered]

we all walk the thin blue line prick! The sad thing is, is there are few great troopers out there that appreciate AG and other agencies. However there are the select few a-holes who think they are something special and are owed special treatment. You keep running your mouth about Ag and I bet you'll be driving a lot further and more often to check that s76. It's funny that just today, heard over the radio, a couple troopers ask could you have an Ag officer check on that for me because we're busy. The Ag officers never hesitated and went to assist.

[Unregistered]

we all walk the thin blue line prick! The sad thing is, is there are few great troopers out there that appreciate AG and other agencies. However there are the select few a-holes who think they are something special and are owed special treatment. You keep running your mouth about Ag and I bet you'll be driving a lot further and more often to check that s76. It's funny that just today, heard over the radio, a couple troopers ask could you have an Ag officer check on that for me because we're busy. The Ag officers never hesitated and went to assist.

Because there were 5 of you morons standing around a shack "window shopping" and lying about how many trucks you inspected. What, you want some credit or a medal because you took a break from lying about your numbers to do some real law enforcement work. Congratulations you reject flunky. Now go chase down that empty livestock trailer that just bypassed, loser.

[Unregistered]

Wow what day did you drive by an inspection station and actually see five people manning it? Gonna call B.S. on that one. It must be so exciting to be a trooper. You guys sound so cool all day on the radio "I'm X98 from the 76 they got the tire changed". Then "Show me on a S4 vehicle versus road debris". How do you guys contain yourselves? I'm so excited just talking about it that I'm gonna drive down and stare at the be a trooper road sign. Wow true rock stars of Florida law enforcement. By the way does NoFla Trooper stand for No Frickin Likeable Attributes? Good One you guys are really clever too.

[Unregistered]

Wow what day did you drive by an inspection station and actually see five people manning it? Gonna call B.S. on that one. It must be so exciting to be a trooper. You guys sound so cool all day on the radio "I'm X98 from the 76 they got the tire changed". Then "Show me on a S4 vehicle versus road debris". How do you guys contain yourselves? I'm so excited just talking about it that I'm gonna drive down and stare at the be a trooper road sign. Wow true rock stars of Florida law enforcement. By the way does NoFla Trooper stand for No Frickin Likeable Attributes? Good One you guys are really clever too.

- says the guy with no take home car, who has to clean bathrooms every shift and has to explain WTF he is to John Q Citizen everytime he gets to take a "field trip" to the gas station. Cheer up sparky, we're laughing with you....not at you - right?

[Unregistered]

After staring at your billboard last night I felt compelled to send a letter to the Governor for the sake of all FHP Troopers. I've enclosed an abbreviated version. Remember I'm not laughing at you, but with you SPARKY. Who says sparky anymore?

Dear Governor Scott, I am writing to appeal for your help for the mental and emotional health of the Troopers of the Florida Highway Patrol. Having studied these men and women for decades in their natural habitat (Highway medians and gas stations) it has become apparent to me that the majority are suffering from delusions of grandeur and a serious superiority complex. Although I am not a licensed medical professional I assure you that I have grown up watching Quincy reruns and was a big fan of E.R and Grays Anatomy, so I'm almost a doctor. It is my unprofessional opinion that we can save what's left of these guys sanity if we do three things.

1. Immediately stop them from wearing hats. In a Quincy episode that aired May 1980 it showed the disastrous side effects when the blood flow is impinged from the brain. These poor guys cinch that hat band so tight across the fat roll on their neck it is stopping the blood flow to the frontal lobes. This in turn impedes emotion and rational decision making.

2. We must remove every other white lane marker from the interstates. The constant visual barrage of the white lines passing numbs rational capacity and could lead to superiority psychosis. If we could also repaint the remaining harsh white lines to a more soothing green or tan this may help. Painting the lines could soothe the damage done to the ocular nerves and maybe then these guys could see that they are not so superior to everyone else, and that they too have a low paying dead end state job.

3. Mandate that all Troopers wear size appropriate clothing. Yes we at Ag Law are fat however we wear size appropriate clothing that allows for full extension and free flow of our girth. I saw this on Dr. Phil about just being me. I fear that these fellows cramming an extra thirty pounds into their vest and then cruelly expecting those Velcro straps to hold it all in are doing extreme gastro-intestinal damage. Top it of by wedging it all into a shirt that's two sizes too small and it's easy to see why they spout hot air from their mouths all day and are so anal retentive. E.R 1997.

Please sir help these poor fellows. I beg you for your help.

[Unregistered]

Your mom did a good job typing all that out for you. Now go clean the bathroom, loser.

[Unregistered]

Wow what a well thought out response. You sure got me being the fifth person to use the bathroom thing. I feel sad for your lack of originality so I wrote you FHP guys a poem. Hope you like it:

I walked into the Jiffy Store, Just the other day
I heard some troopers talking, Here's what they had to say
I don't like Ag Cops the first one blurted out
Unless of course we're begging them, to check a 76 call out
I can't stand a Deputy, the second did opine
I've never seen a single one with skills as sharp as mine
I can't stand a city cop the third one did conclude
There's no way try as they might they could ever be this rude
Then number four the youngest one yelled out O.M.G
We are all so much smarter than those at FDLE
Then they stood and stared contentedly, at their reflections in the glass
As I walked by I couldn't help but say, You guys can kiss my Ag Law A**.


Your lack of original banter bores me get over yourselves.

[Unregistered]

Wow what a well thought out response. You sure got me being the fifth person to use the bathroom thing. I feel sad for your lack of originality so I wrote you FHP guys a poem. Hope you like it:

I walked into the Jiffy Store, Just the other day
I heard some troopers talking, Here's what they had to say
I don't like Ag Cops the first one blurted out
Unless of course we're begging them, to check a 76 call out
I can't stand a Deputy, the second did opine
I've never seen a single one with skills as sharp as mine
I can't stand a city cop the third one did conclude
There's no way try as they might they could ever be this rude
Then number four the youngest one yelled out O.M.G
We are all so much smarter than those at FDLE
Then they stood and stared contentedly, at their reflections in the glass
As I walked by I couldn't help but say, You guys can kiss my Ag Law A**.


Your lack of original banter bores me get over yourselves.

If we only had as much down time as the elite force of Sheep Sheriffs. Why don't you put out another BOLO for that load of squash that bypassed the station while you're at it.

[Unregistered]

If we only had as much down time as the elite force of Sheep Sheriffs. Why don't you put out another BOLO for that load of squash that bypassed the station while you're at it.

We used to be better, now were just f'n corn cops because of the "leaders" in Tally. Are colonel is a jackass lying fat slob. He has ruined this place so now we just scrape the bottom all the time. He has promoted ass kissers and liars who kiss his ass for everything. I hate this place and I hate those Tally scum.