Silly Stuff

Every once in awhile I have to read this site. Who ever is writing some of this stuff, you missed your calling, you should be writing for Jay Leno. It is brought to tears from laughing so hard, thanks for the updates and entertainment. Someday things will get better and I hope it is soon.

There are so many good officers and civilians working there. Just keep your eyes on the prize. I love my ranch/farm and look out and see the beauty of everyday. But I will always miss my nights working with many of you. To bad you all can't sent the pidgeons to me, as most of you know I love all animals. I don't think their are pidgeons near me, but lots of other wild life.

Robin

Every once in awhile I have to read this site. Who ever is writing some of this stuff, you missed your calling, you should be writing for Jay Leno. It is brought to tears from laughing so hard, thanks for the updates and entertainment. Someday things will get better and I hope it is soon.

There are so many good officers and civilians working there. Just keep your eyes on the prize. I love my ranch/farm and look out and see the beauty of everyday. But I will always miss my nights working with many of you. To bad you all can't sent the pidgeons to me, as most of you know I love all animals. I don't think their are pidgeons near me, but lots of other wild life.

Robin

wow do we miss people like you Robin. Wile E. Coyote and his band of merry misfits are out of control. there is not one veteran here who hasn't said they have never seen morale this bad, even from some of your past hard times. at least laughter kind of gets us through. thanks for the writing compliments, i wish i could take some credit but seriously, in my wildest dreams i could never think up the silly stuff that these idiots try to pass off as good management.

we all can't wait to join you in retirement...except for Mr. Sociopath-he has decided to piss away his retirement and time with his family because his pathetic life is driven by spite and greed.

Every once in awhile I have to read this site. Who ever is writing some of this stuff, you missed your calling, you should be writing for Jay Leno. It is brought to tears from laughing so hard, thanks for the updates and entertainment. Someday things will get better and I hope it is soon.

There are so many good officers and civilians working there. Just keep your eyes on the prize. I love my ranch/farm and look out and see the beauty of everyday. But I will always miss my nights working with many of you. To bad you all can't sent the pidgeons to me, as most of you know I love all animals. I don't think their are pidgeons near me, but lots of other wild life.

Robin

I'm with you Robin, enjoying the hell out of retirement - I am truly sorry the administration feels compelled to continue to act poorly in so many ways. I guess some thing never change. I have days where I miss some of the people, possibly the job itself, but not the city and those who run it...

Mel

Once again..... MEEP MEEP !!!!!!!!

Just How Silly Are We?????-
last week i was asked to email a police report by the state attorney. i had to explain that we cant do that. the state attorney looked at me like i had three heads. i began to explain our system, but i think he was born around the same time that ms-dos and the AS400 were created. he then said "fine just save it to a flash drive and bring it up here so we can read it and/or print it out. i then had to explain that i can neither save the report to a flash drive nor remotely print it because because the printer has to be manually logged into the AS400 and assigned some numbered code. the state attorney was just exasperated at that point and asked what does he need to do? i said "well i can call the front desk, have them print it then put it in the fax machine thats as big as a TV and sound like a rusty meat grinder and fax it to you"...welcome to 1987. every agency i talked to has their stuff squared away. you get a police report from them and it has easy to read windows format , people screens with mugshots attached all kinds of stuff. our reports look like Barney Miller typed them on a typewriter. does anyone else get that mystified look from other agencies when we explain some of our stuff? i got cops laughing at me over our computer issues and no training. its humiliating. thanks bosses... just remember, everyone:

"OF ALL THE CHARLIE BROWN'S IN THE WORLD, WE'RE THE CHARLIE BROWNY-EST!"

Now listen here you bunch of wascally wabbits. I have gone to da state atty's office many times as you all know and never have I had a problem gittin reports printed. I simply call the front desk and say "hey yall dis is momma I need report number so and so printed up and faxed to me at what ever number". Then poof like magic it comes through the fax machine. On a side note the bird poop facial cream really works and because of it I have gotten rid of all the wrinkles surrounding my mouth from years of puffin on cigarettes. I have even been able to go u.c. as a go go dancer, just how do you think I took down the cheetah? So yall drink up on the hateraid and keep the comments commin. Just remember don't hate the player hate the game.

Peace out haters :mrgreen:

Don't wrap me up in your dumb $h*t. All I did was buy a lousy christmas tree... you guys are way more F#*CKED up then that. :|

I will kill the pigeon with my spear and my Magic helmet!

From the Desk of John E. Pigeon (Captain Retired)

hello folks. as you can see i retired but was immediately hired back under shady circumstances. please be mindful of the southwest corner of the Sally Port. Agnes the Blackbird has joined us and built her nest here. Congratulations on your new flock of chicks,Agnes. i would also like to thank the bosses for the fishing line. out of all its uses, i think the best one was you guys stringing it up so as to act like a guidewire. we can $h't in perfectly straight lines now.

in other news- Stanley created "PIGEON TEXTING" by $h'tting the word "LOL" on top of a K-9 car yesterday. way to go, Stan! for all of you eagerly awaiting a coop update, the Sally Coop is still going strong. however, the adminstration has stopped further construction in order to jumpstart the work being done in the men's bathroom. since the leaky shower pans and pipes have caused the tiles to fall apart and be replaced by mold that grows as thick as moss, management put this item back on the front burner. even though a handfull of illegals could complete this job in 5 hours, our bosses have stuck to their gameplan in true hallandale fashion. workers went in last week, smashed up the showers, threw their materials in the stalls.....and left. but dont worry, Wile E. Boss was kind enough to wrap the entire area in crime scene tape as well as put a sign on the door that says the men's room is inoperable (by the way, Wile E., inoperable is one word-not two). there is no set date for completion and the locker room will be out of order indefinately...or as Wile E. would spell it: "IN DEFINATELY." hopefully it will be done soon because we would like to build a second floor on the Sally Port to accommodate Seagulls and Buzzards. our goal is to completely bury a patrol car in $h't by next fall so that you need a shovel to clear it off. we also believe the enhanced feeling of doom that comes with a buzzard looming over you will add to the ambience at the P.D.

Have a Great Day!!

wwwwlolololololololololl!!!!!!!!!MEEP-MEEP!!

How about this one for silly...the part-time officers/detectives are issued take-home cars but have NEVER contributed to the fuel costs. Yep, that's right...even when our bi-weekly fuel contribution doubled...the part-timers still contributed absolutely NOTHING!!!!!! Someone please enlighten me on the thought process on that one. And don't let anyone lie to you and tell you that this is not true...it is the absolute truth. If you don't believe it...ask around to the guys with a set that will tell you the truth.