Silly Stuff

is it true that we are called the OPA LOCKA PD of broward law enforcement? someone told me thats the running joke around broward agencies.................real nice

More silly stuff...

a police department where the Captains have to work on Saturdays but the SET Team does not. SILLY

a VIN Unit that is never seen past 5 pm (must be working a banking investigation). JUST PLAIN SILLY

having officers assigned to PAL, however they are never present at any PAL events. Road Patrol gets their balls busted if they are not seen on PAL patrols. RIDICULOUSLY SILLY

hiring a 50 yr old as a LEO. Seriously, what are we going to get out of him...7 years ??? HEAD SCRATCHING SILLY

hiring back select retirees to do a job that should be offerred to current employees. I mean afterall, who hasn't heard the excuse the past year by a certain boss that we need to move people around in order to give other people opportunities because we are a small department. POMPOUSLY SILLY



QUIT

Stay tuned...more to come

memo to: the Chief's Office

your computer skills match your literacy. in the future when you quote someone, post your response outside their quote...but kudos for spelling QUIT right...or thank your secretary. :devil:

MEEP MEEP !!!!!!

Please watch the following clip and envision Wile E. Wearing an HBPD uniform, you will laugh hysterically

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Iv56kSfvjfA

this one is even funnier because i know a certain captain will be wetting his pants laughing when he sees it

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ek-RJQdcozU

The other day I brought in a 10-15 and as I was getting him out of my car he looked up at the ceiling of our secured salley port and snickered. I asked what was funny and he said "you got birds livin up there and they're crapping all over everything. That aint very professional is it?" I could only respond back with a simple nope as the pigeons chimed in with their wooolloloolololo. Talk about a real $hit hole of a department. We are truly the armpit of the law enforcement community. Thankfully I retire in two years and NO I will not come back as a part timer. The chiefy has held enough stuff over my head for long enough.

MEEP MEEP

DON'T WORRY OLD TIMER. I HAVE THE SOLUTION THAT WILL GET US RICH.....OR AT LEAST MAKE US LOOK YOUNGER!!

ARTICLE ON FOX NEWS: BIRD POO FACIAL PROMISES YOUNGER SKIN!
If you've ever had bird poo drop from the sky and onto your head — heck even if you haven't — it's probably pretty hard to imagine forking over almost $200 to have someone massage bird doodoo into your face for the better part of an hour.

But there's a price to pay for healthy skin and many in New York City are “flocking” to try this latest anti-aging craze.

FORGET THE 8%!! WE'RE SITTING ON A GOLD MINE!!!!!

I could hear it now. The chief walking down the hallways saying "Officer / Sergeant so and so... Ya know... those pegions are not gods creatures they are mine; therefore all their scat is mine too. I tried to offer it to the members as a raise, but the union voted it down. You see the opportunity I tried to provide for my employees, but Jeff and Your union Reps wouldn't have it. Now you can sit there and watch me earn all this money selling scat facial cream. I tried to help you, heck... I even crapped on each and every one of you several times, but you wouldn't listen. By the way what does my badge say? Yep you know it... CHIEF, cause thats who I am. Just ask Jimmy he'll tell ya. Now go to a pal event while I scrape up my loads of poo."

Every day when I'm driving into the city for work I play the I-95 song by Jimmy Buffett and think about how it applies to the Admin of this P.D. I copied the lyrics below so you can all read them and get a chuckle as I do. :snicker:


Well I was drivin' down I-95 the other night.
Somebody nearly cut me right off the road.
I decided it wasn't gonna do any good to get mad.
So I wrote a song about him instead.
It goes like this...

Were you born an a$$hole?
Or did you work at it your whole life?
Either way it worked out fine
'cause you're an a$$hole tonight.

Yes you're an A $ $ H O L E...
And don't you try to blame it on me.
You deserve all the credit.
You're an a$$hole tonight.

You were an a$$hole yesterday.
You're an a$$hole tonight.
And I've got a feelin'
you'll be an a$$hole the rest of your life.

And I was talkin' to your mother
just the other night.
I told her I thought you were an a$$hole.
She said, "Yes. I think you're right."

And all your friends are a$$holes
'cause you've known them your whole life.
And somebody told me
you've got an a$$hole for a wife.

Were you born an a$$hole?
Or did you work at it your whole life?
Either way it worked out fine
'cause you're an aaaa$$...hole tonight.

MEEP MEEP !!!!'n

THAT'S MY BIRD$H'T, GOD*AMMIT!!! MINE MINE MINE!!!! IT WAS ALL PART OF MY PLAN SEE...I INTENTIONALLY BUILT THAT BIRDCOOP TO KEEP THE PIGEONS!!!! ALL THE ROYALTIES FOR BIRD$H'T FACIALS ARE MINE!!!!! ME ME MY MY MY ME MEM ME. CAPTAINS I HEREBY ORDER YOU TO GO SCRAPE UP AND BAG ALL THE BIRD$H'T OUTSIDE!!! IT IS HEREBY ORDERED!!!!! AND I WANT THAT KID FIRED FOR POWERWASHING MY PROFITS AWAY!!!! IT WAS NOT I WHO ORDERED HIM TO WASH THE SALLY PORT, I AM INFALLABLE. IT WAS..............YOU!!! YOU OVER THERE IN THE BLUE SHIRT!!! I POINT THE FINGER AT YOU!!!! YOUR FIRED TOO!!!! ME ME MY MY MY ME ME....LET ME RUB SOME OF THIS ON MY FACE!! HAHAHAHAH I LOOK YOUNGER ALREADY. NOW I CAN STAY HERE FOR 50 YEARS!!!!!!! I'M GONNA DO BIR$H'T INFO-MERCIALS!!!! TO HELL WITH GEORGE FOREMAN'S GRILLER -LOOK AT ME ME ME ME MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHAT'S THE SMELL IN THAT GOOP ON YOUR FACE???......................................ME, BABY....ME.....