Favorite (or worst) sayings

What are the best (or worst) things citizens have said to you? :lol:
Someone who thinks there important:Citizen: "Do you know who I am?"

Officer: "No, do you?"

Citizen: "Ahhh... yea..."

Officer: "Then why are you asking me?"

I had some ultra rich tourist ask me this same thing in the middle of a densely populated tourist area out at Siesta Key. I looked at a large crowd of people gathered at Siesta Village and called out to them: "Excuse me, folks, I have a man here who doesn't know who he is. Can anyone identify him, please?" :shock: :lol:

[x8]

I actually used this one the other day when a lady got super angry and red faced and jumped out of her car and came charging back towards my patrol car yelling "Can't you just give me a warning?"

I said "Yes, ma'am. If you don't get back in your car, then I'm taking you to jail." :shock:

Customer: "I was just going with traffic! Look..all of them are speeding, why don't you stop them?"

My reply: "You ever been fishing? You ever catch all the fish?"

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Customer: "What took you so long to get here? I waited a half hour for you get take this crash report!"

My reply: "Pizza man takes atleast 45 minutes to deliver your food......and you give him a tip!"

A State Trooper stopped a man driving 90 miles an hour...As the trooper got to the driver's car he said, " If you don't have a damn good excuse for driving at such high speeds, I am going to put you under the jail".....the driver replied. "I don't have an excuse, but this is what happened, "Six months ago my wife left me and ran off with a Trooper, and when I saw you behind me, I speeded up because, I THOUGHT YOU WERE BRINGING HER BACK !!!!!"