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View Full Version : We Need Thicker Skin!



12-06-2007, 03:57 PM
I have come to the realization that our department, as a whole, needs to develope some thicker skin. More and more, I am seeing drama manifesting itself and people getting upset (IA's being created) over what I would primarily consider to be "good fun".

Wake up guys! Take it easy! Are we not all adults here? Have we not, ourselves, been guilty of having a laugh at somebody elses expense? All I am saying is that we have enough to worry about when we are out there on the streets. When we take the opportunity to have a little fun, to break up the stress that comes with this job, do we need now to also worry about if this fun is going to result in an IA, and eventually maybe a suspension?

Obviously, this post was created in light of one of our current IA's involving such joking matter. I think the fact that that situation has gone this far is embarrassing. I am worried that some of our officers have become so sensative...even about a that situation did not involve them in any manner. I am worried that this sensativity could affect these officer's performance on the road. What happens when a subject calls one of these officers....oh, i dont know....peter pan? Are they going to flip or can they let this roll of of their back. I guess I should just follow everyone elses lead and stay away from these officers as much as i can.

12-06-2007, 04:04 PM
Develope? That's a new spelling I think. The idea behind coming to work is to work. The fun comes from doing your job well. Fun at other people's expense is not an acceptable part of the work environment. Nice try though. I wonder how your thick skin will react to this post.

12-06-2007, 08:28 PM
That reply was horrible. I agree that people are way too sensitive around here.

12-06-2007, 08:45 PM
Tell us something about yourself, so we can have a little fun at your expense. Let's see, your accent, gender, race, religion, height, weight, age? Nobody is safe right? Other people are too sensitive until you become one of the other people. Aren't they teaching sensitivity or human diversity there anymore?

12-06-2007, 09:59 PM
Get over yourself......if you cant take someone joking around then get another job. If you cant laugh at yourself and take a little laughing at something stupid that you do, then thats just too bad. Go be a thearapist or ask everyone "how they feel" about you walking down the hallway on the left instead of the right, just incase that might offend them because they do things the other way.

When is it going to end, when we have no friends and noone to joke around with. When we all hate coming to work because we are afraid that someone is going to not like what was said in the report writing room, that they just happened to overhear that was never meant for thier ears anyway!!!!!!!!!!! (We all know who im talking about) That is when it will affect our job performance, that is when someone will be so preoccupied with something else that some gets hurt or worse.

We dont need that. Those people need to realize that we all know who they are and they wil never be trusted in any sense.

12-06-2007, 10:12 PM
Easy there. You're all hot and bothered. Calm down and reread your post. What YOU want counts. As long as everybody else likes what YOU do, they're ok. Must everyone at work joke around like you apparently want to? Isn't anything funny that isn't connected with the subjects mentioned in an earlier post? If you want to joke around so much, do it off duty and let others get about what they are paid to, and want to do, free of snide comments. Guess what? What you think is funny is not funny to everyone. Again, if I find out what ticks you off and mention it, are you going to "get over it?" Lester and John - Are you getting this? I think you have some issues there.

12-06-2007, 11:17 PM
You missed the whole point to that response. I am very disapointed.

12-07-2007, 01:18 PM
I think the whole point to the original post is that this used to be a profession full of practical jokes and fun with one another. Now it has become a over sensitive profession. Us along with the Fire Service were typically known for poking fun and practical jokes between one another. Maybe it has changed because people just don't get that anymore or have no life experience. And yes it is sad that we have to be very careful what we say and who we say it around. Maybe some don't realise that we are a family and thats what family members do. If more would think of us that way and not as individuals that just come to work and do a job because if thats what you want you might want to think about finding a new profession. I am proud of what we do and consider everyone that I work with as an extension of my own family and that is how it used to be and should be now.

Take care and be safe.

12-07-2007, 01:54 PM
You describe a disfunctional family, but if you're happy, that's all that counts, right? If somebody doesn't like to be part of your family, get out, try another profession, buck up, get with the program, etc. Is that why you got into the job, to get a family, to joke around, to have a good time? I haven't heard anyone say you can't have fun on the job, just not using gender identification, sexual orientation, age, race, political affiliation, as the basis for that fun. That is the point and if you don't get it, you're going to be very cynical or unhappy or depressed while at work.

12-07-2007, 07:06 PM
Nobody used age,sex,sexual orientation or anything else with the joke that was played and went to far. Grow some skin , laugh and get them back.

12-07-2007, 07:16 PM
Gosh! Everything must be ok then. Nothing's wrong. Sorry to have defended people that don't need it. I'm sure IA will get to the bottom of it. After all, they are the police police.

12-08-2007, 01:54 AM
You're right, poking fun at people isn't funny if they're not laughing too. Most of us have a healthy sense of humor about ourselves and live in the real world where we are imperfect. Our imperfections are a source of humor for ourselves and everyone else. There are those who can't laugh at themselves. And still worse, there are those who like to laugh at others but still can't take a joke themselves. They are the worst kind. If you can't take a joke, better damn well not EVER make one about somebody else. What goes around come around.

Unfortunately, all of you are missing the real point. Instead of the people who had the problem going to the problem maker(s) and addressing it, someone ran to a member of command staff and "tattled." Tattling has become rampant. There are several examples in the last couple years of people running and tattling instead of just going to the source of their frustration and asking for an apology or a cessation of the problem.

What you all REALLY need to worry about is someone running back to the office and tattling on you because you said a swear word to someone on a call and they were offended. There is a very, very, very small group of officers (term used loosely) who feel it is their moral obligation to tattle on people whether they (the loosely termed officers) were involved or not. And God help you if you cross one of the clique... revenge will be forthcoming in the form of tattling.

My crystal ball is showing me a future response - let me address it now...

TO THE MEMBERS OF THE TATTLE TALE CLIQUE - ALL of you, ALLLLLLL of you, have done things in your past that you should be ashamed of. ALLLLLLL of you have made mistakes on the road that, if judged without all the facts or twisted the right way, would have resulted in discipline and possibly termination. Some of you have flat out F'd up in big, serious, bad ways, but survived because no one tattled on you and made an issue out of your mistakes. Not ONE of you is perfect. Take a few moments of self-reflection and think back to your pasts - your legendary behavior hasn't faded into memory just yet. Those who live by the sword will die by the sword. You, too, will slip up and say something that can be misconstrued. Or you will make a joke about a friend of yours and a third party will overhear the joke and be offended.

With record numbers of officers being killed in the line of duty by bad guys, you all feel the need to stab each other in the back. What a shame.

12-08-2007, 02:35 PM
VERY WELL SAID IS ALL I CAN SAY.

12-09-2007, 02:09 PM
This is not family here. Family is waiting for me at home each day the people I can trust and depend on. This place I come to each day it's a job and that'a all it will be. Nothing that goes on in this department makes any sense and noone has the balls to make any changes. When changes happen and lazy people start getting fired for not pulling their weight maybe then can this place be considered family....but until then this is just a job!

12-09-2007, 03:15 PM
Totally agree that Family is at home!! I will say this though, I have a blast at work and sometimes it is at the expense of others. Well ok, MOST of the time it is at the expense of others. What people need to understand is that you can't joke around with everyone.

I don't joke around anyone I haven't known for years. We have lowered our hiring standards so much to fill the holes that this is what we have become. An earlier post complained about IA. I don't know about you but with all the BS that has gone on MIds, I have yet to see anyone get burned! So if you think people are being punished for their stupid crap, show me. Yeah, you might be "talked" to by the LT but if you think that is punishment from IA then grow up little man.

I do agree 100% that we need Sgt's to step in and put out the smoke before it turns to fire. Unfortunately the majority of supervisors here don't have the sac to pull an officer in the office and knock em down a peg or two. They just want to disappear and not make any waves and let OPS catch the potato. Wimpy supervisors breed Wimpy officers.

Sorry, went on a tangent! My point is dont joke around people you don't know or trust. Just watch for a week the smart ones. If they want to say something that may be inappropriate to others they will separate themselves from the group(report writing room) and talk or joke in private.

12-09-2007, 03:40 PM
This is the new age of policing. More IA's, me attitudes, no camaraderie unless you are brown nosing at softball, those who dish can't take, supervisors that are a hinder that are allowed to stay and suck the life out of the rest, tickets instead of real proactive policing, and the list continues. And for those that live in glass houses who say work is work, not play. Please! Everyone please step back for a moment and reflect why most decided to come here. Each will be different, but most carry similiar traits. To serve, team environment, to the drive a cruiser as you wished in your childhood, sometimes actually make a difference, be a pillar of the community, scuffles, "I've got on running", to become a sargent, be a narc or SWAT(TAC, sorry), and etc. Just remember how it started. Feed off it. Look after each other. Don't dish if you can't take. Smile. Crack some jokes. Don't talk behind each others back if you are not willing to say it in person. What happens outside, stays outside unless its criminal. Bring your issue first to the person of origin. If that does not work, use your chain of command. Come to work to work. But, forget to be human.......

12-09-2007, 11:32 PM
I guess I created a monster here...

First of all, I am apalled that there are apparrently more than one officers that can say "Family is at home, not at work...I go to work to work and thats it". I knows that this is cliche, but this job is not a job- its a lifestyle. I may not be close to everyone I work with, or even like everyone I work with, but I would (without hesitation) place myself in danger to help any one of you all. You dont get that with your co-workers at McDonalds or Bank of America. This job requires a sense of brotherhood, aka family, to be successful. If you are just here for the paycheck, then you are just a hazard. (obviously, we are all here to get paid...lets not start that argument. I am just saying that I chose this job because I genuinly care about what I am doing)

As far as "the issue" goes, it was not a poke at someone's gender, age, sex, etc. It was a poke at someone's personality and actions. Let me make a very important point here:

*THE TIME THAT A JOKE LOSES ITS HUMOR AND BECOMES OFFENSIVE IS WHEN IT IS BASED ON UNCHANGABLE TRAITS* (i.e. race, sex, physical traits)

GS- The joke was based on your actions and the way you carry yourself. If you have a problem with it, instead of making a big deal about it through supervisory (dont worry, I know you werent the one that tattled) why dont you think about why the joke was made and make the changes that you need to! They arent calling you Tinkerbell because you are a female midget! And by the way, you aren't innocent either. I have seen you joke around with people to the point that they are obviosuly upset...and then you laugh about them getting upset!

And to those that think only a dysunctional family pokes fun at each other, you could not be more wrong. I couldn't imagine a family closer than mine...and that is all we do! When I get together with my parents and siblings it is a favorite pastime to tell old embarrasing stories or laugh at each other's mistakes. This is how people bond. This is how we learn the real side of people and know what people really think of us. Believe me, I would much rather take a little criticism than to think that everyone is hiding how they really feel about me.

To get back on topic, the ACTUAL point of this post was that we are slowly losing one of the traits of this job that I loved most. L.E. has long been a proffession that didnt require us to be politically correct all of the time. We could actually work and have fun at the same time....believe it or not, it is possible. But that seems to be going away. I am glad that a lot of people seem to agree with me.

To those of you who seem to think that there is something wrong with the jocking around that occurs...mayeb you shouldnt be posting on this site until your IA is over.

12-09-2007, 11:35 PM
I realize some of my spelling was atrocious <------- Case in point

No need to waste time calling me out on it. Although, no worries...I wouldn't tell on you.

12-10-2007, 01:57 AM
Lets not forget that the little turdball wrote a very nice e-mail saying how offended he was to the LT....then went in to IA and said how offended he was.......this mess is on him regardless of who tattled!

12-10-2007, 09:55 PM
Turdball? That doesn't extend much respect to your associate. Ah, but it's all in the family, so call the person anything you want. That person must be one of the black sheep in your close family. How did they even get into this agency anyway? Chief - please do a better job of screening out potential whiners. All this IA business could have been avoided if you had examined the applicant more closely. Shame on you for letting this person into the family.

12-11-2007, 01:44 PM
Jocking around? Did you mean joking? Who writes your reports? Here's a suggestion. Learn to spell and use the proper word in your posts. Anyway, it sounds like you and some other posters were sleeping during the diversity class, if you even had one. Ask to go again. I'm sure JC and Lester will oblige. Take some of your homogeneous associates with you.

12-12-2007, 02:55 AM
You wrote:

"Here's a suggestion. Learn to spell and use the proper word in your posts."

You SHOULD have wrote:

"Here's a suggestion: learn to spell and use the proper word in your posts."

Even with the grammatical correction, it's still a very poorly written sentence. The awkwardness of your wording detracts from your message. Before picking on people's spelling, make certain you are perfect.

Also, I notice the focal point of your attack was spelling ability. I reread the original post and found no reference to spelling problems within our department and no accusations by the original author regarding anyone's spelling abilities. Therefore, we must conclude one of three things:

1.) You believe that if a person mispells a word while trying to make a point or present an argument, the spelling error inherently renders the entire point or argument invalid. This, of course, is silly.

2.) You believe you are better than everyone else and you never make mistakes. As such, anyone's opinion other than your own is invalid.

3.) You are insecure in your decision to be a "tattletale" and feel as though you were personally attacked by the original author. Therefore, you feel the need to personally attack the author in return, but don't have anything worth saying other than, "You're a bad speller... na-na-nanny-boo-boo."

In any case, you're a retard. Na-na-nanny-boo-boo. Oops, sorry, retard isn't very sensitive. I better ask to go through diversity training again. I do remember that training though. It was the meeting where Susan Stanton told us that she owned our mouth's 24/7. But that's probably okay with you, right? Careful. Don't slip up and say something funny in front of the wrong person. Next time it might be YOU explaining your actions to IA.

:D

12-12-2007, 03:02 AM
Sorry, I meant, "mouths," not "mouth's." Dammit! Now my whole point is invalid!!!!!

12-12-2007, 11:43 AM
You must be related to original poster. See, that's the idea. Nobody likes being picked on. I see what gets your goat though. I don't see why you can't make a point and use correct spelling and grammar too. Are you writing original poster's reports as well as defending him? I'll bet you're both white males. Finally, should have written, not wrote. Fire away sensitive one.

12-12-2007, 04:41 PM
Well, I have no idea who has written on this post other than the original post and the follow-up one because I am that person. In taking time to re-read my second post, I actually called out myself on the spelling problems. Do you know why I did that? Any takers????

Answer: To prevent ignorant people like "To Original Poster" that like to come onto this site and act as though the spelling or grammer of an informal website post is more important than the issue at hand. "To Original Poster", you're an idiot. I really don't feel the need to run spell check on my internet post. I think everyone got the point that I was trying to submit. If anyone saw the word "jocking" and could not figure out what I meant to type, than they must have the mental capacity of a 5th grader. If you are trying to relate this issue to our job, "To Original Poster", then I hope that when you collect written statements from witnesses, you take from them the witnesses' accounts and don't find most important their spelling and grammer issues.

I do, however, have one positive note to make from your posting; The fact that you have read all of these posts, which are completely calling you out (I say "you" because I feel confidant in knowing who "you" are), and all that you can argue from them are the spelling errors...well, this tells me that you are incapable of defending your actions or even giving a legitamate reason as to why you acted in the way that you did. Maybe this is the point that you SHOULD have taken from my post.

12-12-2007, 06:12 PM
It doesn't take much to anger you. All the name calling and defending of your position is not necessary. Just take from the message what you can and move on. I don't know what the IA is about, nor do I know who the complainant is. I don't feel like an idiot or a retard, but calling people you don't know names is what I would expect from you. An informal site is not license to butcher the language. Take some pride in your written word. What do you do when your reports are kicked back for any number of a hundred reasons, or don't they do that any more over there? It's hard to regard a post as serious or knowledgeable from one who is not concerned about their spelling or grammar.

12-13-2007, 04:51 AM
So.. How did we get off the subject of the tattle tails?

12-16-2007, 04:36 AM
Develope? That's a new spelling I think. The idea behind coming to work is to work. The fun comes from doing your job well. Fun at other people's expense is not an acceptable part of the work environment. Nice try though. I wonder how your thick skin will react to this post.

you say fun at other people's expense is not acceptable; however you always point out a word not spelled right. maybe it was a slip of the finger my middle one is slipping right now towards you

12-18-2007, 08:17 AM
Leave the rookie on mids alone. He was pushed by a MORE senior Officer to go and file the IA and then play like "Scarlett O'Hara" when she recieved her IA appointment. WHAAAA!!! No body will go with me to meal any more...............Your garden, lay in it!

It's Officers like this that kill a PD. They should be telling younger Officers to shack it off then get creative on how your going to get back at them. Imagine her as a SGT. We would be doomed.

12-30-2007, 10:49 PM
could not agree with you more...

Though it does not excuse his actions, I do believe that it probably would not have gone to such great extents if it were not for the divine intervention of that senior officer. I guess spending all that time in YSD, telling children that it was ok to tattle on others, convinced her the same.